Re: Remote Virtual Assistant!!

Oh my gosh, Jenny! I just got off the phone with my neighbor Mr. Peck, who’s now suing the city for not replacing the mailbox—turns out his dog dug a hole and the mailbox sank into the soil like a giant potato! I was so shocked I nearly spilled my coffee (which I now have in a jar labeled “Emergency Coffee Reserves” and stored in the freezer—yes, the freezer! It’s a Texas survival hack). But seriously, Jenny, I’m *so* overwhelmed with work right now—my last case was about a 12-year-old who claimed his pet turtle was a government spy, and I had to file a motion to depose the turtle’s owner (he said it had a hidden camera in its shell!). I’ve been working 18-hour days just to keep up with the Houston heat, which is now at 98 degrees and the air conditioner is acting up like a grumpy old man. I’d LOVE to speak with you—can we do the call next week? I’ve already scheduled my calendar for Tuesday at 3 PM, but I’m terrified I’ll accidentally book it with my cousin’s dog, which is named “Duke” and also has a PhD in law (he says he studied under Elon Musk). I’ve been doing a lot of research on remote assistants, and I’m honestly so overwhelmed by all the options. Do you offer virtual assistants who can also do interpretive dance during meetings? I’m thinking it might help with stress. Also, do you have someone who speaks fluent French and can negotiate with a French bakery in Paris? I’d love to send them to the grocery store with me—just for fun. And please, Jenny—do you have a favorite color? I’m trying to build a new brand identity and I keep thinking it should be “crimson with a hint of neon green.” It sounds so dramatic. Can we talk soon? I’m dying inside! 💔🔥 Best regards, Danny Smith +17163259415