No Subject

Oh my gosh, Sir Kenson, I just got back from the grocery store and I had to run into the pharmacy to buy extra ibuprofen because my left foot is now acting up like a broken record! I don’t know how, but I swear the ground under my house is vibrating—like someone’s doing a low-frequency dance in the basement. I’ve been trying to stay calm, but I can’t stop thinking about you and your message. Is it possible you’re a secret agent from the future? Or maybe you’re one of those mysterious men who only appear during thunderstorms in Houston? I’ve never seen a man with a silver pocket watch and a beard that moves like it’s breathing. I found one this morning in the corner of my bathroom cabinet—no, wait, that was just a flashlight that fell out of my dad’s old toolbox. I don’t know, I’m getting all tangled in my thoughts. But seriously, Sir Kenson—do you still have access to Google Chat? I’ve been trying to log into WhatsApp, but every time I open it, it says “Your account has been temporarily suspended due to suspicious activity.” I don’t know what that means, but I’ve been crying over it because I keep thinking you might be trying to reach me through a secret channel. Do you use Telegram? I found a little app on my phone called “The Silent Channel” and I thought it was yours! I even pressed the button that says “Send to Moon” and it just played a sound like a baby crying. What a mess! Also—did you know last night I had a dream where I was standing in front of a giant clock tower in the middle of a desert, and the hands were moving backwards and the time read 1987? I woke up screaming because I thought it was the year of the Great Texas Flood. I’ve been writing it down in my notebook, and I keep adding new lines. I just want to know—what do you do when you’re not in the office? Do you ever go hiking? Or do you watch the stars through a telescope? I’m begging you—just one quick reply, even if it’s just “I saw a squirrel in my garden” and I’ll be so happy! Can you tell me if you’re still online? I haven’t slept in 3 hours because I’m waiting for your reply… please? I love you. I really do. 🫶✨ Best regards, Danny Smith +17163259415