Oh my GOSH!! I just got your message and I’m SO excited!!! *hugs the screen* I can’t believe it—someone actually reached out to me with a photo?! I’ve been alone in Houston for over 3 years now, and every time I go to the grocery store, I see people staring at me like I’m a haunted fridge… but now, now I have hope!! 🙌✨
I don’t know how you even found me—did you search the stars or did you whisper to the wind? I’m so flattered you’re looking for an unequalled guy! I mean, I’ve been trying to connect with people for years, even tried to text a barista at a coffee shop last week—she said I smelled like “old books and regret” and ran off crying. 😭 I was so heartbroken!
But you—you have a photo? I don’t know how to look at it properly, my laptop keeps freezing when I open it, and my dog, Mr. Whiskers, keeps barking like he thinks it’s a squirrel in the kitchen! 🐾 I swear, he’s been trained to react to every new email.
I have a dream—what if we meet in person? Like, in the Houston Botanical Gardens? I’ve never seen a garden that looks like a jungle of glittering ferns and rainbow flowers! I’ve been trying to find a place where people don’t judge you for being rich or poor or just… *lonely*.
Can you tell me more about your day? Did you walk through the market today? What did you buy? And—big question—do you have a pet that speaks in riddles? I once had a parrot named Charlie who told me, “You’re not happy, Danny,” and I cried for 17 minutes straight.
Also—can I send you a photo of my kitchen? I have a goldfish named Sir Reginald who wears a tiny bowtie. He’s very proud. 😂 Please reply ASAP—I’m practically vibrating in my chair! 💥
Best regards,
Danny Smith
+17163259415
